Your pie maker's on vacation, as of now!
(Please don't rob my house.)
(If you do rob my house, TAKE EVERYTHING, and I'll just stay in France. Win-win.)
I'll post photos at Nomads Unlimited, so check there!
Next Tuesday, young adult author Beth Revis will post an interview with me to her awesome blog, Writing It Out. Put her in your feed to get the goodness. And add her book, ACROSS THE UNIVERSE, to your queue; it comes out from Razorbill next spring!
Today is normally fitness/health day here at daily pie, so I'll just say this: we've packed our running clothes. We will counter this dubious decision by ingesting A LOT of local cheese and red wine.
See you on the Nomads blog...
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
On the Road
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
I Turn 40...You Win!
This is maybe better news for me than you.
Except I've decided to celebrate with a contest!
Interested?
Here's the deal: Leave a comment telling me one way my 40s will be even more rockin' than my 30s. Bonus points for funny. In fact, if I wet myself laughing, you'll probably win. And since I'm 40 now, that's pretty likely.
If I pick your entry, you get a $40 gift credit for any online retailer that sells books -- print, ebook, audiobook, whatever. IndieBound, Fictionwise, iTunes, Barnes & Noble, Target, and Amazon come to mind, but you'll pick your favorite.
Sound good?
Awesome. Have at!
[Also: Deadline is 9am Central, Wednesday, 24 March.]
[Also-also: This contest is cross-posted at Facebook, so comment at either place. It's also on Twitter, so feel free to tweet your entry @nomadshan.]
[image via Cake Central]
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Monday, March 22, 2010
#FrankenSmack Tale: DAY 8
A couple weeks ago, author Mike Jung challenged me to a Frankenstein story smackdown, and being of a foolish and compulsive nature, I accepted. Today, we post our #FrankenSmack tales.
Make sure you read Mike's story, right here!
Note: This story's more PG-13 than most of my posts, and more YA than the project I currently have on submission. So.
DAY 8
The syringe is heavier than I expected.
The liquid inside looks like piss. It wobbles as I clear the air. Then the needle points down again, and I grip the cylinder with both hands. Extend my arms. And hesitate.
A drop hits his perfect chest.
He growls in frustration. “What are you waiting for?” His eyes glint, entitled, like two little pools. I hate them and the way people always fall into them, thrashing as he holds them under, then loving him more when he lets them surface.
I haven’t fallen in, I tell myself. My arms shake in front of me. I won’t.
“Christ.” He takes a deep breath, huffs it out. “Relax,” he mutters to himself. His hands flex under the wrist straps. “Almost there.”
I frown. Almost where? Then I get it: Vic Stone never does anything he can’t take credit for later. So he can’t have thought this through. He thinks he’s coming out the other side.
“No points for second place.”
He’s not.
“Nut up, you worthless piece of—”
Turns out, the force I use is more than required. He grunts with the impact. But my aim is good. The syringe stands like an exclamation point beside his sternum, his open mouth the misplaced dot.
He stares at the thing like he didn’t think I’d really do it.
I jam the plunger down with my fist.
* * *
When Vic suggested this eight days ago, I thought he was crazy.
Or crazier than usual. Because when he pulled the nine-volt from his pocket and attached the frog’s feet to the terminals and it jittered in its wax tray, I wanted to puke. Afraid to touch it, I stabbed its chest with a dissection pick to hold it in place and yanked the battery from its feet.
Vic looked at the pick, then at me with that beautiful, arrogant grin. “Exactly, Iggs.”
Then the principal showed up, called me into the hall, and handed me the worst day of my life.
*
The funeral happened quickly, of course. So did my decision to sit shiva. It didn’t matter that I wasn’t his son or brother. He’d been my mother’s father. My namesake. My best friend. He’d taught me how to play chess. Prepared me for my bar mitzvah. Charmed the bakery girls out of extra bits of rugelach. We would wink at each other over those pieces because they always tasted best. How could I not cover the mirrors and light the candle and spend seven days thinking about what he meant to me?
Only...around day three, about the time my ass went numb from sitting on the floor, I thought about the dancing frog. I shuddered.
I waved off the blanket my mom brought over, but she ignored me and draped it around my shoulders anyway. “Take care, Iggy. Don’t freeze on his account.”
I pulled the blanket tight. It helped. It kept the unholy thoughts in my own little cocoon, where they could fester and twist and feed on want, and turn me into something my family would never recognize.
I emerged two days later. I made some excuse about peeing, then veered into the guest room, where our coats lay on the bed. Mine was on the bottom, so I had to dig. When I found my cell, I broke shiva and texted Vic.
Told him to get everything together.
Told him where to meet me.
Told him tonight.
Then I went into the study and took a book from the shelf.
*
Vic came over the wall with two shovels and a cooler. He scowled at the name on the temporary grave marker. “This isn’t a woman, is it?”
I set my jaw and pushed my shovel into the loose, mounded dirt. Asshole.
* * *
When the green line goes flat, I pull the syringe from the chest and throw it aside. I don’t have much time. Or maybe all the time in the world—who the hell knows? Have I done this before? Still, I hurry.
With a scalpel I trace the hairline down from one temple, around behind, and back up the other side. Nudging with gloved fingertips, I peel the scalp up and forward, until it rests upside-down on the face. I cover it with damp gauze and pick up the bone saw.
I have done this part once tonight. I had to be careful not to nick the brain, so I was hesitant. I only retched a little, when the saw sprayed bits of skull onto my glasses. On this second head, I’m not so reluctant. Maybe I dig the screeching blade deeper than I need to, because when I lift the pate, matter spills out like oatmeal.
I clean the cavity. Pull the other brain from the cooler. Graft tissue. I staple the skullcap back to its base, stitch the scalp together. I open the drip lines and attach the electrodes.
Finally, I open the book. Circling the body, I say the words. I pray. I apologize to Rabbi Loew, and every Jew who ever lived, for being a superstitious nutjob and the worst rep my people have yet begotten.
Then I wait.
And just when I think I’ve failed—when the light around the blinds begins to pink, and I worry that Dr. Stone will find me here, amid the gore of his favored son—it happens.
It moves.
I grab the shoulders. The muscles underneath twitch. I hold my breath.
When the eyes open, I don’t hate them. They blink at the light, take in the room. Find me. Crinkle at the corners.
“You,” he whispers.
My lungs burn and my breath comes out in a sob. “Grandpa.”
And it’s good. It’s good like the extra rugelach, like we’ve gotten away with something. It’s so good, until he looks down.
Sees his new eighteen-year-old body. My spattered apron. The bone saw.
“Isadore,” he moans, "what have you done?"
His eyes meet mine.
I fall in.
The ripples mar his too-young skin.
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Friday, March 19, 2010
Pastured Animal Products
Man, did they stink. For the first half hour of the roasting, our kitchen smelled like a derelict diner whose grill had never been cleaned. It was bad, folks.
Then we got some bones at the Pearl Farmers Market from L&M Ranch of Floresville. Their animals are grass-fed and grass-finished. This means that for most of the year, they roam pasture for food. They eat the diet they evolved eating and are not stressed by noise or crowding.
And it showed. When Dave roasted the L&M bones, they gave off no greasy stink. And the resulting stock tasted clean.
L&M's meat products had the same clean flavor. In fact, Dave says that when he unwrapped a cut of beef from them, he could smell the grass.
After that, we committed to using pastured animal products at home. These animals tend also to be hormone- and antibiotic-free. Until slaughter, they live relatively stress-free lives. Plus, their food needs require land -- land that can't be developed into a strip mall. We can get behind that.
Our sources:
We get our eggs from Dave's mom (photo in this post). Her chickens seem happy and get to roam and somehow live in peace with Ed and Julie's dogs. It's pretty funny.
At Pearl, we found a source for grass-fed bison: Shape Ranch, which raises and sells ThunderHeart Bison. Dave made sloppy joes with this meat. It was...amazing.
For bacon, pork belly, and pork shanks: Flying Pigs Farm. They raise heritage breeds on a farm in upstate New York. The bacon? OMG good. Dave can hardly wait to cook with the belly.
For other beef, chicken, and pork products: Slanker's Grass-Fed Meats. The beef bacon was weird*, but everything else has been great.
*For me, nothing beats pork bacon. It's the biggest reason I'm not a vegetarian.
[image via Emilene Whidbee for L&M Ranch]
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Thursday, March 18, 2010
Organized, Sort Of
About a week ago, Dave said, "Our passports are current, right?"
"Oh yeah," I said. "Definitely."
Last night, I open the spreadsheet I use to keep track of our accounts, memberships, passwords, and associated expiration dates. I'm using the budget sheets to track our bills, and think, I should check on Dave's passport. So I click on the super-secret-info tab and scroll up to "passport (D)" and look over at its expiration date.
It says August 2009.
I stare. We leave for France in 7 days. "No. NO-NO-NO-NO-NO."
Two seconds later, I'm down the hall and in my office, yanking a file from the cabinet. Visions of me pleading with passport officials, paying crazy big expediting fees, admitting to Dave I wasn't on top of things, canceling our trip -- all these knock around my brain. I feel sick. I throw the file on the guest bed and pull out the passport on top. It feels thick and stiff. NEW.
"Come-on-come-on-come-on--"
I fumble it open. It's Dave's. There are three dates on it: birth, issue, expiration.
Expiration: 2019.
Whew.
I renewed it last summer, a full month before it expired. YAY me.
Then I failed to record the new expiry date in my spreadsheet. BOO me.
So, a tip you guys are way too organized to need: check your passports. Then make sure all your records are up-to-date. Don't give yourselves unnecessary coronaries. :)
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Tuesday, March 16, 2010
Three 5-Star Reviews in Kidlit
In the world of books, getting a starred review is a great thing. Today Publisher's Weekly lists the kidlit books that have earned starred reviews so far in 2010. These reviews came from six sources: Booklist, The Bulletin of the Center for Children's Books, The Horn Book, Kirkus Reviews, Publisher's Weekly, and School Library Journal.
Three books have earned a starred review from five (5) of those journals! Take a moment to check them out:
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Monday, March 15, 2010
On Serendipitous Sidekicks, Writerly Habits, and #FrankenSmack
So last week's story epiphany has proven a tougher think than I first supposed. It'll require some major changes to the execution and will alter turning points, etc. Still, I like it. Really a lot.
And today I realized that the clumsy, dorky girl I had put in the story as main character Livy's home ec partner -- the only other student shunned as much as Livy (and shunned by Livy) is destined to be her sidekick. Inasmuch as you can have a sidekick in a historical narrative filled with dead bodies.
Oh, right.
Also: 100 Habits of Highly Effective Writers. Some great advice there for writing and other creative pursuits, with links to more advice, which probably has more links. So many links.
Finally: #FrankenSmack! Recently, this exchange went down on Twitter between fellow middle grade writer Mike Jung and me...
Mike: I can't decide whether to set this new WIP [work in progress] in a contemporary setting or something more small-scale & Frankensteinish.
Me: @Mike_Jung Really? You can't decide?!
Mike: @nomadshan I am PLAGUED with indecision.
Me: Suddenly want to write a Frankenstein story. Totally my idea.
Mike: @nomadshan OH SURE IT IS
Mike: @nomadshan DUELING FRANKENSTEIN STORIES! *throws down glove*
Me: @Mike_Jung oooOOOooo. It is so on. *grinds glove into dust*
And a story challenge was born: Frankenstein Smackdown! Each of us will write 1,000 words of Frankensteinian awesomeness and post it to our own blog a week from today, March 22. And because the whole world is hanging on the fate of this literary event, it has the Twitter hashtag #FrankenSmack.
At any rate, you'll find my story here at daily pie and Mike's at his Little Bloggy Wog (I'm not making fun -- he actually calls it that).
Stay tuned...
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The Other Pi Day Spread, and a Funny Moment
Here's the spread of pie-tastic items Dave made for dinner with friends (can't remember all the fillings, just that they were yum)...
So after we'd stuffed ourselves with pie, Dave says, "So when's the other holiday?"
Me: "Which one?"
"Pi Day."
"Today."
"No, the math one."
"Today. Three-fourteen?"
"WHAT?!?! You tricked me into a nerd holiday?!"
He totally thought this was Pie Day.
Which, of course, it was, in its way. :)
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How to celebrate Pi Day? Key lime, of course.
So I conducted a poll on Twitter and Facebook yesterday to see what kind of pie I should make for Pi Day. Lots of folks made suggestions (thanks!) and the winner was KEY LIME.
Which is awesome 'cause I love me some key lime pie.
Four years ago, I blogged the recipe. It's really easy. If you use a premade crust, there are only 3 other ingredients. CINCH.
Here's how today's pie went down...
Big bowl o' key limes.
Decided to add lime zest to the filling...
Time to juice the limes...
Things that happened while I was juicing the limes:
- Pi Day came and went
- The LOST series finale aired. Sawyer looks good in a dress, am I right?!
- Michael Phelps got a record 37 gold medals at London 2012
Whew. Ok, so here's what 30 juiced limes look like...
On to the crust...
Pulverized these with my bare hands. Shannon SMASH!!!
Stirred in the butter, then into the pan...
...and this happened...
OK, remember in chemistry class, when your teacher put a crystal on an overhead transparency, put it on the projector, then took this big beaker of liquid and totally POURED it onto the transparency, and you were all OMG THAT'S VALUABLE SCHOOL PROPERTY!!! but then the liquid became this crazy solid pyramid of crystallized something-or-other because it turned out the liquid was a supersaturated solution of something-or-other and when it hit the crystal on the transparency, it crystallized?
Sweetened condensed milk is just like that. Milk, supersaturated with sugar. So, of course, this pie calls for two cans...
Next up, egg yolks...
Can you tell which come from my mother-in-law's pastured chickens? (Hint: it's in the color)...
Then the zest...
Then the juice. Do this step slow and steady, mixing thoroughly...
If you make this at home, you may notice the juice thickens the filling. The lime juice sort of cooks the milk-egg mixture, like it does for seafood in ceviche. That's why this pie has such a short baking time. SCIENCE!
Into the crust...
And out of the oven after just 10 minutes...
And onto my plate...
HAPPY PI DAY!
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Friday, March 12, 2010
Cranberry-Ginger-Pumpkin Bread
You'll need:
3 c all-purpose flour
2 t baking soda
1.5 t salt
1 (15-oz) can pumpkin pie mix
1 banana, mashed
1 c granulated sugar
4 eggs
0.75 c vegetable oil
0.5 c orange juice
2 T ginger syrup
1.5 c fresh cranberries
0.25 c chopped candied ginger
1 c walnut pieces
Now do this:
- Preheat oven to 350 F.
- Grease + flour two 9x5 loaf pans (or three 4x8 pans).
- Combine flour thru salt in large bowl; set aside.
- Combine wet ingredients, in order, until thoroughly mixed.
- Fold wet ingredients into dry, just until moist throughout.
- Stir in berries, candied ginger, and walnuts, just until distributed.
- Divide evenly among pans.
- Bake 1 hour, or until a toothpick comes out clean.
Substitutions:
- Instead of pumpkin pie mix (we had it on hand), use a 15-oz can of packed pumpkin and 1.5 T pumpkin pie spice. Or leave the spice out. The ginger and cranberries lend enough flavor.
- Prefer fresh pumpkin? Use about 1.5 cups.
- No ginger syrup? No sweat. Add an equal amount of honey or agave syrup.
- Frozen cranberries work just as well. If you have dried cranberries, soak them in hot water to plump them up first (drain the water).
- Out of bananas? Add an extra half-cup of pumpkin or any fruit/vegetable pulp (drain excess water).
- Don't like walnuts? Use pecans, or go no-nuts. And be prepared to be called No-Nuts.
ENJOY!
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Thursday, March 11, 2010
Upcoming Destinations
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
5 + 5, Health and Fitness Edition
5 Rather Naughty Decisions of the Week Past
1. Didn't do Sunday's long run. Or today's short run.
2. Skipped flossing two nights.
3. Got to sleep after 1:30 several nights
4. Forgot sunscreen yesterday.
5. Had A LOT of bacon.
5 Pretty Good Decisions of the Week Past
1. Ate more varied salads.
2. Drank more water.
3. Laughed a lot.
4. Relaxed to music.
5. Had A LOT of bacon.
How'd you guys do?
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Tuesday, March 9, 2010
Happy Book Birthday: THE DEAD-TOSSED WAVES
Author: Carrie Ryan
Genre: YA / Fantasy
Find it through IndieBound
Buy the ebook at Fictionwise
Read about it on GoodReads
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Happy Book Birthday: ESCAPING THE TIGER
Author: Laura Manivong
Genre: Middle Grade / Historical
Find it through IndieBound
Read about it at GoodReads
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Monday, March 8, 2010
When Your Story Pulls the Rug Out
A short dialogue, last Monday...
Me: "I'm gonna finish Daughter of the Dead. I'm gonna write 1,000 words a day, and, by mid-May, I'm gonna have a first draft."
Universe: "A-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"
* * *
Best-laid plans, right? Everything goes swimmingly for a few days. I get chapters in order, scenes placed within those chapters, and new words on the page. Then, on Friday, I decide I want to see how the story, written to that point in past tense, reads in present tense.
OK, cool. I save a "past tense" copy of the draft and file it. Rename the working draft "present tense" and begin converting the first chapter. Right away, it feels good. The main characters are young, they're figuring stuff out, they're looking for answers. Present tense is appropriate, it works well, it cleans up all the auxiliary words needed to make verbs for events that happened before the story.
And then it happens. I don't know where it comes from, but without warning, I have an idea that will fundamentally change the story -- and the reader's experience -- yet still works with my existing outline. I sit back and stare at the screen. A Keanu-style "whoa" comes out of me.
I start kicking the hubcaps of the new idea.
Among the pros:
- it reduces the number of POV characters from 2 to 1
- that reduction fits better with the book title
- it adds a great psychological element to the story
- it still leaves room for paranormal elements
- it may allow the reader to explain those paranormal elements scientifically
- it's a more daring approach
- it creates a major twist
Among the cons:
- it creates a very spoilable twist
The pros way outnumber the cons. What an awesome opportunity to take a chance (and scrap my outline if I need to). To develop the characters and surprise the reader. In thinking about the twist, I realize I can address it at the midpoint and then build to an even better revelation for the end. Why not go for it?
So the plan now (ha-ha) is to keep converting the existing text to present tense, and think about the new idea. Going through the chapters is helping me understand how the idea will affect them. By the time I get through them, I should have my answer.
Even though I already have it.
Ever had the rug pulled out from under you (in a good way) while writing? Did you go for it? Did it work?
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Friday, March 5, 2010
New Daily Special: Food Fridays
Time to refresh the Specials board!
First: media is hereby retired as a daily special (though not as a label). I didn't have as much to share about that as I anticipated, so... outta here.
Second: travel will travel to Thursday, starting next week.
Third: Fridays will be all about food.
I love food. In fact, I'm eating -- at this moment -- cranberry-walnut-apricot bread from Central Market. It is very yummy.
(CM's website. Follow on Twitter @CentralMarket)
Also, I'm drinking hot PG Tips (sounds dirty, but it's actually...), official tea of England (not really)(well, maybe) with skim milk and no sugar, because that's how I roll.
I'm pretty much never far from my next bite, which is why I run (see fitness / health).
Plus, I hear that some of you read daily pie just to see what Dave made for dinner. Fine. I'm too weak not to give you what you want, and hey, who am I to keep all those delicious dinners for myself? I'd be big, like a house.
Here, I'll treat you right away. This was a tapas spread created last weekend by Dave and our friend Joe. Clockwise from top left: sliced jicama w/ peanut-yogurt dip, grilled scallions w/ spicy marinara sauce, grilled pineapple, seared beef tenderloin marinated four ways, mushroom caps stuffed with pastured-chicken sausage, dolmas, roasted sweet potatoes, calimari baked in sweet chili and Tiger sauces, cucumber slices drizzled w/ citrus oil and gourmet salt, homemade sweet pickles, grass-fed bison sloppy joe tartlets (yeah, baby!), roasted cauliflower, cucumber "noodles" in Thai peanut sauce, and ancho chile prawns...
We did not eat it in one go.
Now that spring's underway, Dave already has the vegetable garden half-planted. We're just waiting on some heirloom tomatoes we ordered from a fellow in Boerne, then the summer garden will be complete. I look forward to sharing lots of fresh, tasty meals with you here.
Food with friends. Pull up a virtual chair!
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Thursday, March 4, 2010
Subjects! Predicates!
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National Grammar Day!
Two nights ago...
Me: If I tell you I put National Grammar Day on our Google calendar, will you--
Dave: Leave you? Yes.
* * *
*whispers* DON'T TELL HIM.
This day's a fun one for nerds (like me) who enjoy (mentally) correcting mechanical language errors. Many an unnecessary apostrophe lies dying on the bleeding battlefields of my mind.
But grammar flouters can have fun, too. Check out this article detailing 10 Grammar Myths, including many ways you (YOU!) can scoff at so-called Grammar Rules.
If you are a lover of strict usage, though, have a gander at THINGS THAT MAKE US [SIC], by Martha Brockenbrough, founder of National Grammar Day and The Society for the Promotion of Good Grammar. She's also a Crow, so, you know, she's a swell gal.
For ongoing tips on usage, check out Grammar Girl's Quick and Dirty Tips (also available as a podcast through your favorite service).
*triple-checks post for errors before publishing*
[image via National Grammar Day]
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Wednesday, March 3, 2010
Running to the Edge
We registered for a couple of cool running events this spring / early summer:
Fiesta Mission 10K
April 17, 2010
Held the first Saturday of Fiesta in San Antonio, this race winds along part of the historic Mission Trail. Should be a nice, flat course, and a festive atmosphere.
Edge 2 Edge Half-Marathon
June 13, 2010
Our friend Bjoern found this race that takes place on Vancouver Island, BC. Unfortunately, he and Jen won't be able to join us, but we're excited to combine running with travel to a completely new destination! Part of the run is through the Pacific Rim National Park Reserve. Sounds nice, right? An article about the race said we should keep our eyes peeled for sea lions and whales. Um...OKAY!
How about you guys? Ever mixed fitness with travel?
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Tuesday, March 2, 2010
I'll Read It. But Not Yet.
So, writers, ever had this moment?: to take a break from your awesome new work-in-progress, you go to the bookstore, where you stumble on a book with a premise, plot, or characters strongly resembling your WIP.
It's not a plagiarism situation. It's more of a Dang-it-someone-else-got-there-first situation.
When Neil Gaiman's THE GRAVEYARD BOOK came out, he blogged about another author. Apparently, when she heard the premise of his book, she threw up her hands and scrapped her own book-in-progress, which featured a young girl being raised in a graveyard. He said he hoped she'd reconsider.
I think he's right: we can all name two books with the same premise that are still each their own story. Still, I understand the author who thought her project was moot. Especially when the first person to publish the kid in the graveyard was Neil Gaiman.
This has happened to me twice. While writing DOG-BOY, Sara Gruen's WATER FOR ELEPHANTS came out. Then, not long after I started DAUGHTER OF THE DEAD, Amy McKinnon's TETHERED showed up on the shelves.
Lucky for me, my stories are different enough that they aren't in danger. In fact, having those other books out there might help mine, because the published ones are acclaimed and written for different markets (i.e. the pitch for DOG-BOY could be "think: WATER FOR ELEPHANTS for the teen crowd!", only not cheesy like that).
My only problem was that I wanted to read those books. THEY LOOKED SO GOOD! But I'm not going to risk inadvertently cherry-picking something from them. So I'm putting them off. When I've finished DOG-BOY, I'll read WATER FOR ELEPHANTS. When DAUGHTER feels complete, I'll pick up TETHERED.
Till then (and then), I'll just have to wait.
Anybody else have a strategy for this situation?
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Monday, March 1, 2010
On Submission = On to the Next Project
As of last Tuesday, BRIAR-BOUND is officially on submission to publishing houses.
And there was much rejoicing. Huzzah!
Since this normally means a wait for authors, writing sages advise us to GET ON WITH IT and work on a different project. So I'm taking this opportunity to finish DAUGHTER OF THE DEAD, a novel I started in 2008. I have a daily writing goal of 1,000 words. Even with our trip in March/April, I should be able to finish the first draft by mid-May.
Double-huzzah!
Some of you have gone through the submission process to agents and/or editors. Were you able to focus on a different project during that time? If so, did you start something new or pick up an unfinished project? Was your interim project a writing one, or did you choose a different art form?
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